Shame On You

Everywhere we go, wherever we live our lives, there’s a dress code.  Work, school, grocery shopping…there’s what you can/can’t wear, what’s appropriate, and what’s borderline.  For most, including myself, how I look and dress is a personal expression – that being said, I’ve always made it a point to be appropriate.  My style is fairly casual, but also classic.  I don’t subscribe to fashion trends (TIGHTS ARE NOT PANTS) – I prefer what’s comfortable, flattering, and timeless.

That being said, I’m short, I have a fairly decent figure, and I like to wear sky-high heels (see point #1).  It’s come to my attention that normal shirts seem to be a lot more revealing based on the fact that people are literally looking down at me while speaking, and if I want something to fit appropriately on 90% of my body, I’m going to look like I am wearing a Wonderbra on steroids.  None of this matters, however, because I dress very professionally at work – even if I have a bit of Jenna flair in my shoes or the colors:  Note two typical outfits, one summer, one winter.

IMG_20140626_164745507 IMG_20140922_150657824

This is why, yesterday, when my boss added my coworker to our 1:1, and took us outside and we were just going to hang out and chat for a while, I knew something had to be up.  And I was right.  Sitting around a table, laughing and smiling, she revealed that the COO had told the department director to tell our boss to speak to us about how we “dress too sexy.”  She said she thought this was unfounded, a horrible conversation, and motivated by jealous, crotchety old people at work.  There were no examples of “too sexy,” but nonetheless, we’d been reported and were being asked to change our clothes.

After that, my coworker and I were dumbfounded.  We racked our brains, analyzed every article of clothing, and tried to speculate who in the world would have reported us.  We made ourselves sick with worry – and I gave myself anxiety trying to figure out how to afford a new wardrobe.

Is it body shaming?  Is it jealousy?  Should I start dressing like a frumpy old woman in oversized, mismatched clothing?  Has anyone ever told me anything other than, “You look so nice!” or “Wear those heels now, you won’t be able to at my age!”?  Is it my fault I am young, eat healthily, and regularly work out?

It came to light that the complaints did come from a crotchety, bitchy, old hag.  Someone that decided sleeveless (at lunch, outside, in 95* heat) is inappropriate for the workplace. Someone I will not miss when I leave here.

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30 comments

    1. The person in question is quite high up, and he’s an angry gay man. Not angry like “I’m fabulous, and haters gonna hate” angry. Like “I am legitimately angry at the world and want everyone else to be miserable.”

      Sigh, back to the polo shirts and long sleeves…even in the sweltering sun of August.

      1. I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction! Couldn’t you compromise and wear mid-length sleeves? It’s not like you’re shoving your boobies in his face 🙂

      2. Being short (as I’m sure you know), looking in the mirror means not a lot of cleavage. But when people talk to you, and they are tall, all they see is the magical crevice between your knockers. I just wish he took the fact that I was OFF CAMPUS and it was lunchtime into consideration .

      3. Nope 🙂 I did get told off for wearing jeans into the school though, even though I wasn’t teaching and had just popped in to photocopy some stuff. Silly. Wore shorts next time and seemingly that was OK!

      4. Ha, I don’t know if it’s that, but I was so frustrated with the whole situation. Some people are just so miserable, they need to hate on those that aren’t….

      5. Of course it’s THAT. What else would it be?? You’re attracting the attention he wants to attract but can’t. And to get a (het) man’s attention, being a young woman is sufficient. Looking ‘nice’ is but a bonus.

      6. I love your positivity! It’s another thing to add with “why I should leave this place.” Maybe take another holiday in Spain 🙂

      7. Not being positive, just realistic. You can’t help being a girl, it doesn’t matter how you dress… there’s no point dwelling on it and diving yourself crazy over someone else’s problem that you can’t possibly fix.

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